In English

What did the bartender say after a book walked into the bar? – Jokes

Q: What is a man’s idea of a balanced diet?
A: A Budweiser in each hand!

Q: Whats the difference between Amy Winehouse and Captain Morgan?
A: Captain Morgan comes alive when you add coke!

Q: What did the bartender say after Charles Dickens ordered a martini?
A: “Olive or twist?”

Q: What did the bartender say after a book walked into the bar?
A: “Please, no stories!”

Q. Why did God invent Jameson whiskey?
A. So the Irish would never rule the world!

Q: What do Russians get when mixing Holy Water with Vodka?
A: The Holy Spirit!

Q: What goes with Coronavirus?
A: Lyme disease.

Q: What did the man with slab of asphalt under his arm order?
A: “A beer please, and one for the road.”

Q: You know what’s fun about being sober?
A: Nothing.

Don’t want your friends to come over and drink all your beer during the quarantine?
Just tell them you have a case of Corona.

Q: Why did Mexicans create tequila?
A: So ugly people would have a chance at having sex!

Q: What do you get when you mix English class with alcohol?
A: Tequila Mockingbird

Q: What has eight arms and an IQ of 60?
A: Four guys drinking Bud Light and watching a football game!

Q: How can you tell if someone Amish is an alcoholic?
A: They keep falling off the wagon.

Q: How many men does it take to open a Budweiser bottle?
A: none. the lady should already have it open on the table!

Q: How can you find the guy who drank a case of Coors Light?
A: He’s the one dancing like an asshole!

Q: How do you know a man is really really gay?
A: When he’s nursing a Bacardi Breezer!

Q: What happens when a ghost drinks boos?
A: They get sheet-faced.

Q: What’s the difference between a G-Spot and a bottle of Jack Daniels?
A: A guy will actually SEARCH for a bottle of Jack Daniels.

Q: How does a man show he’s planning for the future?
A: He buys two cases of Miller Lite instead of one.

What’s the cure for marriage?
Answer: Alcoholism.

Q: Why does Corona go through your system so fast?
A: Because it does not have to stop to change color

Q: How do you get a computer drunk?
A: A Screenshot of Tequila.

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