Q: Why do blondes take the pill?
A: So they know what day of the week it is.
A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, “I slept with a Brazilian….”
The blonde replies, “Oh my God! You slut! How many is a brazilian?”
Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up?
A: To catch everything that goes over their heads.
Q: What does a blonde and a beer bottle have in common?
A: They’re both empty from the neck up.
Q: Why was the blonde upset when she got her Driver’s License?
A: Because she got an “F” in sex.
Q: What does a blonde do when her laptop computer freezes?
A: She sticks it in the microwave!
Q: Why did God give blondes 2 more brain cells than horses?
A: So they don’t shit in the parade.
Q: What is it called when a blonde blows in another blonde’s ear?
A: Data transfer.
Q: What’s the mating call of the blonde?
A: “I’m sooooo drunk!”
Q: What do you call 10 blondes standing ear to ear?
A: A wind tunnel.
Q: Why are blondes bad at Hide and Seek?
A: Because they can never find the sausage.
Q: Why did the Blonde go to the Apple Store?
A: She wanted a Big Mac meal.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde corn maze?
A: It only had 1 stalk.
Q: How do you get a blonde off of her knees?
Q: What is a cool refreshing drink for a blonde?
Q: How did the blonde try to kill the bird?
A: She threw it off a cliff.
Imitation of a blonde refuelling..
(Flap hand, blowing air into ears)
Q: Why did the blonde stare at frozen orange juice can for 2 hours?
A: Because it said ‘concentrate’.
Q: What do you call 10 blondes at the bottom of a pool?
A: Air Pockets
Q: What has 12 feet and an IQ of 40?
A: A Blonde-tourage.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde who gave her cat a bath?
A: She still hasn’t gotten all the hair off her tongue.
Q: Why do blondes wear ponytails?
A: To hide the valve stem!
Q: Why can’t the blonde write the number eleven?
A: She didn’t know which “1” came first!
Q: What goes: vroooom-schreech, vrooom-schreech, vroooom-schreech?
A: A blonde at a flashing red light
Q: Did you ever hear about the blonde who bathed herself and drank cleaning substances?
A: She wanted to be spotless inside and out.
Q: How do you confuse a blonde?
A: Ask her to alphabetize a bag of M&Ms.
Q: What do you call a blonde holding a balloon?
A: Siamese twins
Q: Why did the blonde put sugar on her bed?
A: Because she wanted sweet dreams!